Dear Purdue Pharmaceuticals,
I appreciate the fact that you reformulated your blockbuster pain medication, Oxycontin, to make it more difficult to abuse. The new tablets are hard, will not dissolve, and cannot be crushed. Therefore, they can only be swallowed whole, not injected or snorted, the way the product was intended.
However, you made one mistake. You changed the markings on the tablet. Instead of "OC" they now say "OP." You cannot imagine the problems this has caused me. I had a woman yesterday come in to get her routine prescription of sixty tablets of Oxycontin 80mg. I explained when she picked it up that we only had the reformulated tablets. I explained the purpose of the reformulation, and told her the markings were different. I assured her that if they were used properly they would still be effective for her pain. She appeared to have no problem with this, and we proceeded with the $700 sale. Thirty minutes later, she wants a refund because the markings are different. You see, they have now lost their street value, and she won't be able to make the $6000 she could have sold them for.
On second thought, you have achieved your goal, while annoying me in the process. I guess I will take the annoyance in exchange for making it harder for people to abuse drugs while keeping pain meds avalable to those with legitimate need.