Thursday, November 18, 2010

I thought I had seen it all...

So I got a phony phone-in prescription the other night. Not so unusual, right? What was it? Vicodin? Xanax? No...this chick was trying to call in her own prescription for...Diflucan! It went like this.

Ms. Itchycooch: "This is ER PA, agent of Private OBGYN, and I need to call in a prescription."

Me: "Ok..." I call shenanigans on this one at the first sentence, but I play along.

IC: "..."

M: "Yes?"

IC: "It's for Ms. Rotten Itchycooch."

M: "Ok, what are we giving her?"

IC: authoritative tone "Diflucan, one dose."

M: "What strength?"

IC: "The one dose pill."

M: "Ok, what strength?"

IC: "The one dose pill. I dunno, it's like 250mg or something like that?"

M: "It's 150mg."

IC: "Yes, yes, of course, it's the 150mg."

I collect the prescriber's phone number and thank the caller. A quick call to the ER, where ER PA works, and I confirm that this is a bullshit Rx.

Ms. Itchycooch walks up to the counter and I do something I have never done in all my 13 years in the pharmacy...I laugh in her face. Rude? Yes. Unprofessional? Absolutely. Wrong? Probably. I said, "I talked to the real ER PA, and she didn't phone in this Rx. You have got to be kidding me with this." She smirked and walked away.

What should I have done? Probably should have been a little nicer, and more helpful, and directed her to an OTC treatment for her issue. I actually feel like I let down a patient in need, but I just get so sick of the bullshit that patients try to pull every day in the pharmacy, and this was the first one that was so clear cut that I could say whatever I wanted to this girl and there was no way anyone could argue that I was wrong. So I guess I took it out on her. Yeah, I feel a little bad about that now.

Anyway, it must not have bothered her that much, because the very next day she showed up at my pharmacy with that same smirk on her face, and a prescription for Diflucan in her hand from the ER. Diflucan 100mg once daily for 10 days. I guess it must have been really bad...


  1. you did nothing wrong..this was not a patient, this was a criminal..we need to remember that rx is rx for a reason and trying to obtain it illegaly is the same regardless of control status..directing her to the capsaisin cream would have been ok in my book...haha just kidding

  2. i wish the powers-that-be weren't so obsessed with customer service, especially with those who don't deserve customer service.

  3. It's sad that I'm no longer surprised that she went to the ER for her entirely non-emergent problem. Sigh.

  4. I cannot believe she didn't go to a different pharmacy. I would have died laughing.

  5. I had a guy call in an Rx for Vicodin, obviously not knowing the usual protocol that gave it away as fake. I recall his distinctive deep voice most of all. I took the Rx and set it aside thinking I would call the doc to verify when it slowed down. I've had a number of doctors who don't know jack about prescribing, so I have to extend some benefit of doubt. Fifteen minutes later a guy appears at my window and asks for his Vicodin Rx in the SAME DISTINCTIVE DEEP VOICE. Are you really that stupid? Really?